Escape from Denmark

To my many brethren back at home -

It has now been over three months since my arrival in Denmark, and I can't seem to find where the time goes. Well, that's not entirely true. It goes towards a three-week über-vacation across Europe! I could spend another few pages rambling about my now banal Danish life, but since the previous two emails have told the tale, I turn now to the massive spring break from which I've just recently returned.

The first week was spent with my academic program on a sort of "study tour" where we visited numerous schools for children with special needs. First stop: Tallinn, Estonia. Now, I'm sure you all remember the details of Estonia's rich history and culture from your Obscure European Nations course in elementary school, but just in case you need a refresher, here's an overview. Estonia, population 1.4 million, is located in far North-East Europe (next to Russia) and was just recently freed from Soviet rule in 1991. This means that the country is still in infancy, trying to regain its footing from decades of communist rule. This also means that people dressed like elves roam the streets! No joke - the tourist industry in Tallinn is booming, especially in areas like "Old Town," one of the most well-preserved medieval districts in all of Europe, where you can find everything from adults dressed in period garb (including, you guessed it, those little elvish shoes that curl up at the toes), to restaurants serving antelope and tongue (I sampled both), to an ambiance that made me feel like I was plucked straight out of a Disney film (probably Snow White or The Sword and the Stone, if I had to pick). It came across as quite gimmicky and artificial, almost too fairy-tale-esque to be legit, but I was assured numerous times that everything I saw was authentic. As our tour guide gently reminded us: "Disneyland models their parks after these types of places, not the other way around."

After our quick glimpse of Tallinn, the group boarded an overnight ferry towards Stockholm, Sweden, where we would spend the second half of our study tour. Wait, did I say overnight ferry? I'm sorry - booze cruise. Never having been on a ship this big, I didn't quite know what to expect, so I conjured the images of the only big cruise ship I have any knowledge about: The Titanic. I guess I don't have to tell you how disappointed I was. Instead of an ambiance of class and aristocracy, we had an atmosphere greatly influence by a most striking color scheme including teal, pink, and gold. Instead of lavish ballrooms with crystal chandeliers, we had a kitschy Cabaret show featuring scantily dressed salsa dancers and sweaty overweight gawkers in the audience. And in place of the evening gatherings on the upper decks to enjoy the view, we gathered at the on-board duty-free store to buy more cheap liquor. While we enjoyed the 'so-bad-it's-good' cruise for most of the evening, a few too many of the girls in our group discovered that alcohol and boat rides don't mix well. I feel for the janitors.

I don't have much to say about Stockholm, except that it is a truly beautiful city. It reminded me of Copenhagen a bit, just in terms of the narrow cobblestone streets, beautiful architecture, and countless sights and structures that all seem to have a story to tell. I spent nearly a whole day walking around, getting lost, and taking photos. Since Stockholm is right on the coast, the city is laced with channels and canals that weave in and out of the various neighborhoods. Accordingly, some refer to Stockholm as "The Venice of the North." Come sunset, the reflection of the scenery upon the water was unbelievable.

But before I could get too attached, it was off the airport again to head back to Denmark. I spent just one night with my host-family before trekking back to the airport for my flight to totally rad destination number three: Les Deux Alpes, France. One of the great things about the program here is that they offer students numerous optional "adventure trips" throughout the semester that are well organized, all inclusive, and best of all, heavily subsidized by the Danish government (so that's where all my tax kroner are going). One such trip mentioned skiing and French Alps in the same sentence, and I knew I had to go. What I have to say about this trip may sound like exaggeration or hyperbole, but I assure you it's all true.

After the first eight-hour day of skiing, I knew this was going to be one of the most incredible experiences of my life. At the summit - 3600 meters above sea level - we were able to ski on top of the largest skiable glacier in all of Europe. And the view from the top was indescribable, easily the most beautiful sight I have ever seen. We had one major world-traveler in our group who has visited all the major mountain ranges around the globe, and he affirmed that the views we shared in Les Deux Alpes were by far the most impressive. Oh, and the skiing wasn't too bad, either. We had a light dusting of snow almost every night, leaving a perfect powdery paradise for our skis come morning. Most of the slopes were above the tree line as well, so we were able to make tracks across the entire mountainside, no boundaries. Few of us thought we would make it through seven consecutive days of nonstop skiing, but none could resist the opportunity once we realized how ideal it was. Nobody could believe what we were seeing and experiencing. It was truly awesome.

Then I packed my bags, bused to the airport, flew back to Copenhagen, arrived at 1:00am, slept for 3 hours, awoke to a very busy airport, raced through security, and caught the next flight to Rome. It was a long night.

The next three destinations went by in such a flash and I didn't have time for much more than the accumulation of cultural stereotypes, so you must take the following with a grain of salt. It began when I met my Mom, a family friend (Mary Crouch) and Colombina Valera in Rome for a five-day whirlwind tour of Italy. We spent most of our time laughing and eating, and I wouldn't have had it any other way. A few notable experiences included:
    - Visiting all the major museums in Rome and Venice where we saw more Jesuses (Jesi?) than I ever cared to see. If eternal salvation is in any way correlated with the number of Jesus statues present, the Italians are going to be first in line at the Gates of Heaven.
    - My Mom's allergic reaction to a zucchini blossom risotto which caused her mouth to feel like it was full of sand.
    - Nutella abound, found in everything from tiny to-go packs to industrial multi-gallon tubs.
    - The "Cat Sanctuary", an area of Roman ruins that has been taken over and called home by throngs of mangy felines who just stroll about, chillaxin', actin like they owned the place (oh wait, they did).
    - 'Apertivi,' the concept of paying for one drink and getting a limitless buffet of food included in the price (we've got to start this up in America).
    - Herds of mopeds everywhere.
    - A general sense of chaos, clutter, and disorganization throughout, accentuated by the excessive use of the car horn and incessant sirens, not to mention the frequent, near-death, jaywalking-pedestrian-automobile encounters in the narrow cobblestone alleys.
    - Our afternoon multi-stop pizza tour of Rome (and yes, we did find the best pizza in Rome).
    - The most delicious Nutella crepe I have ever tasted.
    - More beautiful scenery, architecture, history and culture than I could ever put into words.

Then my Mom and I headed off to Prague, just the two of us, for our 33-hour visit in the Czech Republic. There, we...
    - Got ripped off by a fake taxi driver.
    - Tried to learn how to say "Thank You" in Czech, and after several minutes of miscommunication the waitress disappeared into the back, emerging proudly moments later with our bill for dinner ("Check").
    - Found out that when the menu says "vegetables," it means "potatoes".
    - Saw every major tourist destinations in one afternoon.
    - Had more than our fill of Czech dumplings (which had the texture and appearance of a soggy baguette slice, but tasted incredible).

At midnight we caught an overnight bus to Berlin, which, despite my mother's fear of being dangerous and shady, turned out to be quite nice (we even had an in-ride movie and a steward who came around and offered hot drinks). We spent our time in Germany with my new favorite Jew: Emma Woelk (sorry, Joey). Why? Eight words: Boy Band / Awkward High-School Years themed Seder. Being my first Seder, I'm not sure how authentic an experience I had. But somewhere between the tampon references and reciting Hebrew to the tune of N'Sync's Bye Bye Bye, I realized it really didn't matter. Other highlights of our German adventure included:
    - Swarms of prostitutes who all had an appearance strikingly reminiscent of Barbie, complete with blinding blonde hair, unnaturally tiny waists, a few too many layers of makeup, and fanny packs (okay, maybe not too typical of Barbie, but you gotta put the rubbers and money somewhere).
    - A Turkish market full of locals screaming heavily accented German and grabbing for food while we scavenged for leftovers and actually made a nice picnic out of the scraps most would consider "trash."
    - A homeless man who, uninvited, sat down to our picnic and started eating our food. Then Emma said something in German while making a motion as if shooing a fly. "Ich bin auch ein Mensch!" was his reply...
    - A quick stop at Dunkin' Donuts, this of course being the overpriced Berliner hot-spot despite the multitudes of fresh, cheap, local bakeries and cafés.
    - The realization that it's never too early to drink beer; vendors can be found in McDonald's, movie theaters, cemeteries, the gym...
    - 'Luften,' the German concept of opening the windows every hour to let fresh air in, or whenever somebody new enters the room. The reasons behind this are unclear, but one argument is that it helps warm the room faster in the dead of winter ("It's physics!").
    - Eating unsalted butter, the only butter for Germans.

And with that, my three week tour was over. My mom joined me upon my return to Copenhagen for a week, and since then I've all but finished my classes, celebrated the Queen of Denmark's birthday at her royal estate, seen a real Danish soccer (football) game, taken a day trip to LegoLand (Legos were invented in Denmark - the name originates from a contraction of the two words lege godt, or "play well"), and visited the wind-powered island of Samsø for a weekend (Wikipedia it). I now write you from Bornholm, another one of Denmark's 406 islands, where I am biking, eating ice cream, and enjoying the sights with friends. Soon I will meet my brother is Olso, Norway, then be off to Greece and Croatia with my father. But that will have to wait for another email....

All the best!

Dashiell

P.S. - Last time there were some problems with the photos, so I'm going to send them in a different email (okay, four). So if your server wont accept the images, at least you have this text update - I'll share the pictures with you later.

Photos, Part 1 (Tallinn, Stockholm)

The streets of Tallin's Old Town.

 

Watch for pick-pocketers!

Blast from the past.

The charming decor aboard the overnight ferry (booze cruise).

Stockholm, Sweden.

The narrowest alley in Scandinavia!

Stockholm at sunset.

Photos, Part 2 (Les Deux Alpes, France)

Riding the lift.

Beware of...something...

Only 8,300 kilometers from home!

Everything was skiable.

This was on April Fool's Day. As he skied down, I heard him yell "It's bloody cold, mates!"

These bathrooms are entirely stainless steel, and when you leave them, the door locks and nozzles emerge from the walls to sanitize the entire room, floor to ceiling. You'd think with all this technology, the French and the Italians could manage to put toilet seats on their public commodes, but no. (Seriously, they just are. not. there.)

Windblown mountaintop.

Is this real life?

Look closely and you can barely make out the skiers.

Paragliding was offered for 70€ - you affix yourself to the flyer, then just ski off the cliff and float down over the course of 15 minutes or so. Here, preparing for takeoff...

Photos, Part 3 (Rome, Prague, Berlin)

Roma, Italia

Mary, caught in the midst of combat with some valiant warrior in the street.

The view from the Spanish Steps.

The Spanish steps, covered in tourists (see Tammy, Mary, and Bean in the bottom left).

Need a moped?

We dined in an upscale, lovely, local cafe for lunch one day. This was found in the bathroom - it seemed a bit out of place.

The Colosseum.

The tangled web of tram cables in Prague.

St. Charles Bridge

The view from the Prague Castle.

Prague city center, with throngs of tourists.

My camera had some incredibly frustrating focus issues throughout the trip...

Berlin, Germany - Monument in the park.

Brandenburger Tor.

Tammy and Emma do yoga in the U-Bahn station. Normal.

Get your ice cream fix anywhere.

The Holocaust Memorial.

TV Tower.